The Truth About Casual Sex

It’s no surprise in today’s context that many men can’t keep their willies in their pants regardless of whether he’s in a relationship or not. But it still surprises me a little at the increasing number of people telling me (in Asia) that their female friends, ex-girlfriends, ex-wives or all of the above are sleeping around too. I even heard from a guy in his early 20s say that women have nothing to lose when they sleep around because sex means nothing to them these days. Instead, women gain from this as they’ll be receiving gifts, free meals and loads of other freebies from the guys.

Now first of all, why haven’t I met these generous guys?

Jokes aside, I’m about to make a rather controversial statement. Women are not made to sleep around.

Here’s an excerpt of an article I found in an online women’s magazine:

“(It’s not) that we've (women) been brought up to believe in the concept of love and sex going hand in hand. It's that physiologically, sex creates a flood of hormones that naturally create a bond. Oxytocin (the same hormone that women release while breastfeeding) makes us feel close to a partner and dopamine makes us feel content in his company, both of which are released during sex.”

So there you have it! We now have evidence that when we engage in a sexual act with someone, we are emotionally involved.

I know many women would violently object to this. Heck, I would even refuse to admit to this myself when I was younger. I can completely understand that due to sexual equality, women these days are trying so hard to keep up with the boys. If men can make sex look so cheap, so can we. So instead of cuddling up with our one-night-stands after the do, we bounce off the bed before the men, just to prove that we have the upper hand in the game. This is supposed to save us from the embarrassment of hearing the guy go, ”errm…. I’ve gotta wake up early tomorrow morning, so can you…..” Aww…. that ought to hurt.

Another guy friend of mine came to me one day with that know-it-all attitude and declared that in order to have a female partner stay happy in a relationship, a man has to be a stud in bed. I was trying hard not to laugh for fear of offending him. This poor guy obviously knows nuts about the species from Venus. He must have gotten this mixed up along the way with how to please a man!

Unlike men, women don’t have testicles that need to be flushed once every few months. Or is it every few weeks? Let me check with a priest. Oh sure, unattached women have got sexual desires too. But our desires, attached or not, usually stem from the need for affection and attention from the opposite sex (for heterosexual women).

Younger women might not be mature enough to decipher this and think that if they satisfy their sexual urges, that yearning would go away. It does go away during the act itself, but after the ordeal, when they go home, alone, that feeling creeps back in again. So to suppress this, they keep engaging in casual sex, only to realise that they feel more empty inside. If they don’t stop this in time, they’ll eventually lose respect for themselves. Again, these women would put on a brave front to deny this and convince anyone including themselves that they are in control.

Thankfully, most women wake up from this delusion as we mature, have a deeper understanding of ourselves and are more confident about knowing what we want. As long as we’ve got this in perspective, we no longer need to fill our emptiness with casual sex.

Some men might protest at this outrageous proclamation because I have probably cut their prospects by half, but hey, I wasn’t the one who created the woman’s anatomy and psyche.

What do you think?

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